Tuesday, June 21, 2005

It's Not Paranoia If They Really ARE Out to Get You

I'm not usually a member of the tin-foil hat brigade. Working in Government for as long as I have, you learn that stuff happens for mundane reasons, not for fantastic ones. My commute in to work via black helicopter is not evidence of a multi-national conspiracy, but merely an efficient way to avoid the Squirrel Hill Tunnel. My upcoming meeting with the Tri-Lateral Commission on Thursday is not to discuss the continued domination of International Zionism, but only to discuss the impending invasion by the Greys.



I mean... my meeting with City Planning on Thursday is only to discuss the impending invasion by the Greys.



I'll be out of town Thursday.

Anyway, the juxtaposition of two recent articles sent shivers up my spine recently: one the results of the latest Presidential Job Approval Poll, showing GWB's ratings at an all time low and the other a brief blurb on CNN about how Porter Goss knows where Osama bin Laden is.

You remember who OBL was, right? He's the one that was conspiring with Hussein to stockpile Weapons of Mass Destruction in Iraq. Right? No? Hmmmm...

Anyway... if I was paranoid, I might think that the administration, seeing piss poor approval ratings, might be prepping to pull OBL out of their hat, causing approval ratings to rise. GWB enjoys, like he has three other times, a brief surge in the polls and is able to leverage the political capital necessary to make short term gains.

Of course, it only makes sense if there was either (a) an election that they needed the swing for or (b) a crucial vote in Congress that they needed the swing for. As mid-terms are more than a year away, now would not be an opportune time; as Congress is steaming into Summer recess, that doesn't make much sense either.

Would the capture of OBL increase enlistment rates? Lower gas prices? Provide an antidote to Summer TV?

I'm not paranoid, but my Spidey-sense is killing me.

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