Monday, July 14, 2008

Belgians to Acquire Anheuser-Busch; Belgian Government Resigns En Masse

(BBC Newswire) Brussels, Belgium - Belgian Prime Minister Yves Leterme is tendering his government's resignation to the king after the recent move by Belgian firm InBev to buy U.S. brewer Anheuser-Busch.

King Albert II will have to decide whether to accept his resignation.

Mr. Leterme had assumed office with an agenda to devolve governmental powers to the regions and maintain the "purity of essence" of Belgian Beer.

The governmental coalition which put the Prime Minister into office has fractured into the Dutch speaking socialist of the North who believe that the move by InBev is a move to solidify the country as the world leader in fermented beverages, and the French speaking Wallonians who think that drinking Budweiser "is like having sex in a canoe."

While the announcement by InBev that they do not plan on changing Budweiser or Bud Light has placated most Americans, riots have broken out in Brussels and several dozen City blocks remain ablaze at this hour.

The riots are the worst beer related violence in the Country since the Hefeweizen Putsch of 1854, which resulted in the execution of the King of Beers.

1 comment:

The Honourable Husband said...

The Belgians will not change Budweiser? Like, make it into a beer or something?