Monday, April 07, 2008

Mayor makes selections for broads

Pittsburgh Mayor Luke Ravenstahl today submitted to city council a dozen broads, all of whom the young Mayor described as "real first class dames."

Two current council members, Tonya Payne and Darlene Harris, are among those selected. Ms. Harris will heretofore be known as "Hotlips" and Ms. Payne will be known as "Sweet Cheeks". Sports and Exhibition Authority Executive Director Mary Conturo, Mayoral Spokesperson Alicia Sirk, and County Real Estate Manager Valerie McDonald-Roberts, all representing City & County government, were also nominated.

Former Mayoral Chief of Staff B.J. Leber was passed over by the Mayor's Office, despite lobbying efforts by Councilman Patrick Dowd, who called her "a good looking doll with legs that go on forever."

Other broads selected include former Mayor Sophie Masloff, Philanthropist Elsie Hilman, Past President of Pittsburgh Black Nurses in Action Patricia Tucker, executive director of Women in Film & Media Faith Dickinson, Chatham University President Dr. Esther Barazzone, State Senator Jane Orie, and State Representative Chelsa Wagner.

All of the nominees are to get their sweet asses back into the kitchen and make His Honor a martini.


Mark Rauterkus said...

I'm still holding out for the dude crew / other shoe to fall. I'm holding out hope of getting onto the Pgh Ethics Hearing Board.

Do you have any 'pull?'

O said...

Mark, if I had any pull, do you think Mount Oliver would still be standing?

Anonymous said...

at least someone understands the way the administration is run.