*BREAKING NEWS*

By now you've seen what was the lead story was on the print edition of the Post-Gazette:

Sex ranking list of high school girls has Mt. Lebanon abuzz

Really? Really? That was it? That was what the editors decided to go with? Somebody though, "Gee, I know what'll win that Pulitzer Prize in journalism: a story about teenagers who think their classmates are whores. Yeah, that's it." Somebody skimmed over all the wire stories from the AP and Reuters, the bombings in the Sinai, the rebellion in Nepal, the floods in Southern Europe, or even the conflict with Iran and decided that those stories were too "mainstream" for the PG. Or perhaps, instead, somebody thought: "You know what'll sell newspapers? Teenage sex."

But, more to the story: back in my day, teenagers were hormone driven, sex addled, insecure, pimply faced, cliquish, idiots. My guess is that things have not changed much. The technology may have changed the lawyers may have gotten involved, but this is still just, basically, graffiti in the bathroom. I hope the perpetrators' punishment is swift and brutal; but that's just mostly because I favor swift and brutal punishment for teenagers.

Does this story mandate a banner headline? No.

Fortunately, the Trib has a more sensible important lead story:

Diven sends birthday card to deceased voter

The sound you heard was my hand smacking against my forehead. This is not news either. Some dead schmuck was never deleted from the local database, rolodex, call sheet and some intern slapped a label on a card. Fin

Sigh.

Come to think of it, I should just go with the flow on this one; here's my next blog post title:

Local Blogger Publishes Pantsless, Again

Yeah, that'll work. I know you care.