H/t to Bram, who played the Gremlin once or twice to the local Looney Tunes establishment.
I give him three months until he returns.
The Optimist says: "The Glass is Half Full." The Pessimist says: "The Glass is Half Empty." The Bureaucrat says: "What we need are 5 glasses, 1/10th the size." The Angry Drunk Bureaucrat says: "Where's my damned bourbon?"