Monday, January 07, 2008

Legion of Doom Elects Doug Shields as President

Metropolis (AP) - Despite a late push by the Ravenstahl administration, the Legion of Doom elected Councilman Doug Shields to the presidency of that auspicious body.

The vote came early today after the swearing in of several new members: Patrick Dowd, Ricky Burgess, The Riddler, Captain Cold, and Bruce Krauss. The vote came in at 19-1, with only Bizarro voting against Mr. Shields. Both Councilwoman Tonya Payne and The Toyman were absent.

Shield's election came as somewhat of a surprise to Grant Street as it was largely assumed that Jim Motznik had the backing of both Luke Ravenstahl and Lex Luthor. The schemes of the Supervillian were thwarted, however, when Gorilla Grodd switched his alliance late in the day Sunday; Luthor was likewise foiled by his inability to find support for the continuation of the Act 47 oversight and his Kill Superman agenda.

In a released statement to the press, Mr. Shields thanked his colleagues for their support and vowed that all will tremble before the Legion once their giant laser on the moon is complete.

Solomon Grundy, a frequent ally of Mr. Shields was ebullient about the vote.

"Me Solomon Grundy, is impressed with Doug's leadership on the Finance Committee and hopes that he will crush Green Lantern." Sinestro and Darlene Harris agreed with Mr. Grundy's Green Lantern policy, and will introduce legislation to that effect later this year.

Still, the lone hold out on Council, Bizarro, remained adamant in his opposition to Mr. Shields.

"Doug is worst candidate for Council. Me hate him so much. Doug need to learn how to speak up more often."

In a later statement, Mr. Shields reminded the press, "The Council President assumes the office of Mayor, should the Mayor die or leave office," adding "BWHAHAHAHAHA! HA!"


Bram Reichbaum said...

Did you hear Black Manta on Marty Griffin? He really does not like Bill Peduto.

Bram Reichbaum said...

Ha! I get this one now. Classic!

I assume I'll be getting the next one soon...