Friday, August 14, 2009

Bottom 9 Health Care Lies

My email box, facebook account, twitter feed and carrier pigeon roost is filled with forwards outlining the top five lies about Health Care reform:

Lie #1: President Obama wants to euthanize your grandma!!!

Lie #2: Democrats are going to outlaw private insurance and force you into a government plan!!!

Lie #3: President Obama wants to implement Soviet-style rationing!!!

Lie #4: Obama is secretly plotting to cut senior citizens' Medicare benefits!!!

Lie #5: Obama's health care plan will bankrupt America!!!
Slightly less forwarded are the Bottom 8 Health Care Lies:
Bottom Lie #10: The CIA will now be able to give AIDS to the rest of the blacks it missed in the 1980s.

Bottom Lie #9: It will turn Jesus gay.

Bottom Lie #8: Abortions will be made mandatory for everyone who is not pregnant.

Bottom Lie #7: Grandma will be harvested for her organs.

Bottom Lie #6: [Unintelligible due to shouting]

Bottom Lie #5: It turns you into a secret Kenyan Marxist Fascist muslin.

Bottom Lie #4: Americans will be forcibly turned into Europeans, and be made to let children drink and vacation for four weeks a year.

Bottom Lie #3: Medicare and Medicaid will be taken over and run by the Government.

Bottom Lie #2: Dr. House will be mandated to diagnose everything as Lupus.

Bottom Lie #1: There are only 9 Bottom 9 Health Care Lies.
I expect to see these brought up on Fox News any moment now.

1 comment:

Sherry Pasquarello said...

yeah, i think they will be on this week- prime time!