Tuesday, February 10, 2009

$838 Billion Bailout Passes Over GOP Calls for More Witchburning

(Reuters) Washington D.C. - Three Republicans joined all the Democrats in the Senate to pass a modified economic stimulus bill that now moves on to a Congressional Conference Committee, despite GOP demands to increase funding to "Witch burning," "Humor-letting," and "Divination."

"This bill is a bloated, unnecessary waste of take payer money," said Minority Whip Senator John Kyl on the floor of the Senate. "Time and time again and throughout history we have seen that witch burning, humor-letting, and divination are the only solutions to economic problems.

Minority Leader Senator Mitch McConnell was on Fox News later in the day echoing a similar theme.

"The Democrat party thinks that spending money on health care, energy, education and infrastructure -- investments that they say with 'save jobs' and 'create new jobs'. But this is just a misguided pork-barrel bill. What America really needs are things that will put money back into the consumer's pockets. Witch burning is just what we need for this economic crisis."

President Obama brushed off such comments calling them "antiquated" and "heathen."

Republicans have pointed to the rise of the world economy at the end of the Middle Ages, which was a high point for so called "black economic arts" and foreshadowed an increase in wealth over the next century. In the 1970s, the Austrian school of economics perfected this theory, which came to include such spells and incantations massive tax cuts and minimal government oversight. Practitioners are said to keep the spirit of the late President Ronald Regan in an amulet hidden in the mountains of Transylvania.

Nobel Prize winning Economist Paul Krugman called the use of witch burning as a stimulus to the economy "laughable."

"Some people argue that the burning of witches will create jobs, first, by creating which burning technicians and, second, by removing people, that is witches, from the job pool. The problem, of course, is that there aren't nearly enough witches or even practitioners of Wicca out there to burn. You'd have a bigger impact if you started burning Episcopalians or Presbyterians."

Former Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson, in a statement to the New York Times rebutted Krugman's claims saying, "Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu Rl'yeh wgah'nagl fhtagn!"

The Dow Jones Industrial Average was down over 380 points, driven mostly by collapsing Wizard related industries and the Banking sector.


EdHeath said...

Is Reagan's spirit pre or post Alzheimer’s (or does it matter, or does this cross the boundary into bad taste)?

O said...

We're a taste free zone, Ed. Knock yerself out.

Anonymous said...

William Bryan: Scopes Monkey Trial

Evangelical politician late 1800's early 1900's...'the common hero'. Secretary of State for Woodrow Wilson...until fired.

Testified for prosecution at Scopes Monkey Trial in Dayton Tennessee. Clarence Darrow took him apart. Scopes was substitute teacher...had one bad day. Found guilty after Darrow agreed that he was guilty given the way law was written. Scopes paid the $100 fine.

The interesting thing about circumstances was Bryan's argument during trial was simply religion is good compass for life, he could not agree, under cross examination by Darrow, that stories in Bible were factually true...

Heard show on Sunday....that scholars agree that Bible is about "liberty"... for all. That it teaches, that regardless of social class, liberty to think is what binds us a people.

Our Country recognizes this fundamental right and that is why many feel we are ordained to lead world.

Far out, huh?

Bryan goes on after trail and says if we believe in Darwinism, that nitwits and feeble-minded could be identified by genetics…and eliminated as burden on society.

Hitler in wings...?

go figure

Yawnnnnnn, been sleeping again.....


Anonymous said...

TWO PATHS: Memo To Lawyer

I was in my library... Just did Mark Twain autobiography. And, "Godly Hero", William Jennings Bryan biography.

Also, I know when in hands of Nero's minions, Peter, when confronted with death by crucifixion... he said it would be honor to die in same manor as Christ.

Nero staked him to a cross, "upside-down" to prove a point.

Also know that their where those who sang while Rome burned...it wasn't Nero. (mentioned in Court)

Two Paths:

In an effort to maintain balance, two books...will be read together as in past.

"Amish Grace" has to do with schoolhouse shootings and how community responded to wife of killer. (mentioned in Court)

"The God Delusion" by Richard Dawkins, speaks out on religious bigotry. (Carl Sagan kinda guy, mentioned in Court)

Anyhow, don't give up on me just yet....

Time for a nap.


Anonymous said...

Two Paths, two books...one last thing...before departing.

Amish Grace:

"We believe in letting our light shine, but not shinning it in the eyes of other people"- Amish Father

"All author royalties from 'Amish Grace' will be donated to the Mennonite Central Committee to benefit their ministries to children suffering because of poverty, war and natural disaster." visit www.mcc.org

The God Delusion:


"I don't try to imagine a personal God; it suffices to stand in awe at the structure of the world, insofar as it allows our inadequate senses to appreciate it." - Albert Einstein...(victim of religious bigotry.)

...let the journey begin....


Anonymous said...

Reading “Amish Grace” and “The God Delusion” simultaneously…IS insanity.

Jefferson wrote Adams, I believe…paraphrasing, said…‘those that believe biblical myths fear science like witches fear sunlight.’

To complicate matters I choose to listen to “The Wall” by Pink Floyd while contemplating what I read….

The process is mind-numbing!


Hey you, out there in the cold

Getting lonely, getting old

Can you feel me?

Hey you, standing in the aisles

With itchy feet and fading smiles

Can you feel me?

Hey you, don’t help them to bury the light

Don't give in without a fight.

Hey you, out there on your own

Sitting naked by the phone

Would you touch me?

Hey you, with you ear against the wall

Waiting for someone to call out

Would you touch me?

Hey you, would you help me to carry the stone?

Open your heart, I'm coming home.

But it was only fantasy.

The wall was too high,

As you can see.

No matter how he tried,

He could not break free.

And the worms ate into his brain.

Hey you, standing in the road
always doing what you're told,

Can you help me?

Hey you, out there beyond the wall,

Breaking bottles in the hall,

Can you help me?

Hey you, don't tell me there's no hope at all

Together we stand, divided we fall.
[Click of TV being turned on]

"Well, only got an hour of daylight left. Better get started"

"Isn’t it unsafe to travel at night?"

"It'll be a lot less safe to stay here. You're father's gunna pick up our trail before long"

"Can Local ride?"

"Yeah, I can ride... Margaret, time to go! Margret, thank you for everything"

"Goodbye Chenga"

"Goodbye miss ..."

"I'll be back"

Anonymous said...

On side note, Amish as in "Amish Grace" disappointed.

"They forgive only because they fear if they don't... God will not forgive them."

Note: my observation, all 3 have PHD's and are authors of book.

Richard Dawkins in "The God Delusion" calls such beliefs, without foundation.

The difference appears to be what you feel, against what is real. (Feelings are Evolutionary)

I can connect with both...

Leaning towards Dawkins....

Ultimately.... through continued evolution, man will "figure" out that killing doesn't make sense.

It is question of survival(Darwinism).

It is question of time....religion's time is running out?


Anonymous said...

Subject: Idenity

Dawkins an avowed atheist said (paraphrasing) "everyone has heard that there are no atheists in foxholes, I however believe there are no atheists in prison".

Atheists, "think", as a means of survival,....before they act? Not conducive to Darwinism to go to jail....

I remember you mentioning atheist in one if not our first face to face meetings (?)...female from Beechview who was charged with stealing gold.

Gold was found, her body was not....O'hare, Madeline?

Do you think she was set up by religious type?

Looking more and more like I am a humanist. (Gandhi)


Anonymous said...

Ed Heath, looks like Myron Cope!

You Betcha!