Tuesday, February 03, 2009

Breaking News: Mayor Changes City's Name to "Sixburgh"

After changing his name from Ravenstahl, Mayor Luke "Steely" Steelerstahl has officially renamed the entire City of Pittsburgh, partially to honor the Superbowl Champions but mostly to defraud City creditors.

In a proclamation City Council, "Commended the Rooney Family to the devotion to the City," and officially announced that "all debts public and private that were assumed by the City known as 'Pittsburgh' were null and void.".

Moody's gave the new City of Sixburgh an AAA rating, based on it's outstanding debt history.

Councilwoman Tonya Payne offered up a competing proclamation that would have renamed the city "Jeff". The resolution was defeated by council by a vote of 7-0 with one abstention.

Creditors have been asked to forward all mail to Youngstown, OH.

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